pizzaforpresident:

obama was elected the same year the dark knight was released

obama was re-elected the same year the dark knight rises was released…

could it be?

(Source: pizzaforpresident, via maythesenoisesstartleyoutonight)

whisk-ey:

If you want to call a family meeting just turn off the wifi router and wait in the room in which it is located.

(via buttsexonthestairs)

xobreeox55:

things i am scared of doing: 

• ordering food in a restaurant 
• walking down a busy high street on my own 
• talking to people on the phone 
• eating in front of people 
• asking for help in a shop 
• meeting new people 
• being in a big crowd of people with a lot of people i don’t know 

the future looks bright for me 

(Source: idiotgirlchild, via crystallized-teardrops)

pluckypalaeontologist:

sillyunicorntime:

dieceased:

daiyaoowada:

I told my government class about the Great Emu War and half the class didn’t believe me so we had my government teacher look it up on the projector oh my god

only in australia

wait how did the emus win

have you ever met an emu

(Source: tactiletk, via the-cityneversleepsatnight)

quazza:

i am reminded that english is a flawed language every time I am forced to use “that that” in a sentence

(via the-cityneversleepsatnight)

esslaurent:

love—is-my-weapon:

poopflow:

it should be a high school requirement to work in food and retail for at least 6 months a piece so everyone can understand not to be assholes to employees who are just doing their jobs 

and so we actually have some work experience to put on resumes

that’s actually a really good idea

(Source: poopflow, via the-cityneversleepsatnight)

renlybaratheeon:

you don’t know true agony unless you’ve gone from watching 5 seasons in 2 days to 1 episode a week

(Source: christraeger, via the-cityneversleepsatnight)

roughrimjob:

IM ANGRY BECAUSE NO ONE IS KISSING ME RIGHT NOW

(via this--too--shall--pass)

tears-in-the-tardis:

sometimes my mood is ‘beyonce’

but other times its ‘white person in an infomercial’

(via partywhore-hitthefloor)