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peperomint:

nail polish on fingernails: 2 days
nail polish on toenails: 200 years. ur ghost will have glittery toes. ur descendants will come out of the womb w/ revlon 791 midnight affair perfectly applied. infinite

(via dreamingtillreality)

Posted: 4 days ago - With: 138,439 notes - Reblog
Posted: 4 days ago - With: 278,853 notes - Reblog
Posted: 4 days ago - With: 32,115 notes - Reblog

catholicnun:

i want to talk to you but im ugly

(via measurable)

Posted: 4 days ago - With: 570,785 notes - Reblog
Posted: 6 days ago - With: 235,350 notes - Reblog

dumb-science-jokes:

Sex is a lot like science class, you experiment, wear lab coats, Bill Nye is there.

(via dreamingtillreality)

Posted: 6 days ago - With: 52,441 notes - Reblog
baby: d... d... d...
father: ...dad? omg you are going to say dad as your first word!!!
baby: d... dONT WANNA BE AN AMERICAN IDIOT
baby: *guitar sounds from baby's mouth*
Posted: 6 days ago - With: 178,380 notes - Reblog

cchannette:

jwisser:

thepasta-nerada:

vvrathia:

the sexual tension when u and ur crush are online on fb at the same time and u just stare at their lil green dot

and suddenly you know what gatsby felt like

This is actually the most profound and appropriate literary allusion I’ve encountered so far this week.

oh my god

(Source: twoukofukawa, via crystallized-teardrops)

Posted: 6 days ago - With: 585,051 notes - Reblog

owlapin:

making a resume when u have no experience 

image

(via mcr-hidden-track)

Posted: 6 days ago - With: 483,690 notes - Reblog
Posted: 6 days ago - With: 208,724 notes - Reblog

theawesomeadventurer:

straight white boy: what are you doing?

me: laying in bed 

straight white boy: anything else? ;) 

me: no 

straight white boy: are you sure? ;)

me:

image

(via magicul)

Posted: 6 days ago - With: 78,956 notes - Reblog

bogmoth:

"Catholic schools give you a better education!" I was literally told dinosaurs were made up by scientists to lure me away from god

(via measurable)

Posted: 6 days ago - With: 103,887 notes - Reblog
Posted: 6 days ago - With: 220,064 notes - Reblog

landorus:

my #1 turn on is fast downloading

(via magicul)

Posted: 6 days ago - With: 194,803 notes - Reblog
me: damn i need to save my money
me: *spends $200 in a week*
Posted: 6 days ago - With: 131,070 notes - Reblog